{"id":627,"date":"2017-10-16T16:00:17","date_gmt":"2017-10-16T22:00:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/?p=627"},"modified":"2017-10-17T17:13:41","modified_gmt":"2017-10-17T23:13:41","slug":"movie-pirates-of-the-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales-2017","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/2017\/10\/16\/movie-pirates-of-the-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales-2017\/","title":{"rendered":"MOVIE: Pirates of the Caribbean &#8211; Dead Men Tell No Tales (2017)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong><u><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/upload.wikimedia.org\/wikipedia\/en\/2\/21\/Pirates_of_the_Caribbean%2C_Dead_Men_Tell_No_Tales.jpg\" alt=\"Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales.\" width=\"220\" height=\"326\" \/>Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales<br \/>\n<\/u><\/strong>Year: 2017<br \/>\nRating: PG-13<br \/>\nLength: 129 minutes \/ 2.15 hours<\/p>\n<p>Part of me wishes that the title of this film were true. What I wouldn\u2019t give to have these dead men not tell their tale of revenge. That being said, I had some hopes that this movie would help redeem the franchise after the lackluster <em>On Stranger Tides<\/em> (2011). After all, Javier Bardem has proven to be an effective villain in such films as <em>No Country for Old Men<\/em> (2007) and <em>Skyfall<\/em> (2012), so I thought he could help carry this movie as a solid antagonist. Unfortunately, even he could not save this sinking ship of a franchise.<\/p>\n<p>The main problem with <em>Dead Men Tell No Tales<\/em> is that it feels rote and uninspired. Depp\u2019s Captain Jack Sparrow feels more lucky than actually talented at pirating. Granted, that was <em>some<\/em> of his charm in the previous films, but not all of it. Add to this a loose connection to the original trilogy as a vain attempt to remind the audience how great those films were, and it just highlights how bad this movie was. In fact, I felt the many overt double entendres were more groan-worthy than clever, merely pandering to the lowest common denominator. I can only assume that was why the doe-eyed and tightly bosomed Carina (Kaya Scodelario) featured into the plot so much.<\/p>\n<p>In a franchise that stakes itself on wild swashbuckling action sequences, this film had maybe two of note, and even they were uninteresting at best. This movie might have been better if it picked its battles more carefully, as the plot seemed like a stone skipping along the sea: never going very deep into any single character\u2019s arc, thus making them all seem insignificant when compiled together. If it was merely about Salazar\u2019s (Javier Bardem) revenge, Henry\u2019s (Brenton Thwaites) desire to break his father\u2019s curse, or Carina\u2019s search for treasure; then it might have been interesting. Unfortunately, it is all of these things and none of these things at the same time.<\/p>\n<p>A film that proves it\u2019s time to abandon ship on this franchise, I give <em>Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales<\/em> 2.0 stars out of 5.<\/p>\n<h1><strong><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-647\" src=\"http:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/10\/255px-Five-pointed_star_svg-150x150.png\" alt=\"255px-Five-pointed_star_svg\" width=\"50\" height=\"50\" \/>\u00a0<\/strong><strong><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-647\" src=\"http:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/10\/255px-Five-pointed_star_svg-150x150.png\" alt=\"255px-Five-pointed_star_svg\" width=\"50\" height=\"50\" \/><\/strong><\/h1>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales Year: 2017 Rating: PG-13 Length: 129 minutes \/ 2.15 hours Part of me wishes that the title of this film were true. What I wouldn\u2019t give to have these dead men not tell their tale of revenge. That being said, I had some hopes that this [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[36,2],"tags":[349,837,840,839,841,13,434,838,836,8,28,461],"class_list":["post-627","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2-0-stars","category-movie","tag-349","tag-dead-men-tell-no-tales","tag-jack-sparrow","tag-javier-bardem","tag-johnny-depp","tag-movie","tag-no-country-for-old-men","tag-on-stranger-tides","tag-pirates-of-the-caribbean","tag-review","tag-series","tag-skyfall"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/627","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=627"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/627\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":828,"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/627\/revisions\/828"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=627"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=627"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/benjamin-m-weilert.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=627"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}